Page 191 - a-columbia-county-boys-recollections-and-memories-of-columbia-county-florida-(2012)-lenvil-h-dicks
P. 191

A Columbia County Boy's Recollections and Memories of Columbia County Florida (2012) Lenvil H. Dicks








                                                 A LITTLE HUMOR


               An old fanner showed up at his lawyer’s office early one morning, and told his lawyer, “Well, I guess I
               need to get you to start a divorce suit for me”. The lawyer said, “Why, I thought you and your wife got
               along great?” The farmer said, “Well we always have, but she told me to come up here and get a divorce
               started that we have simply got to get a divorce”. His lawyer asked, “Well, what happened?”

               “Well, it was like this”. I was out milking the cow in the cow shed, and as soon as I started putting milk
               in the bucket, the damn old cow picked up one of her hind feet and put it right in the milk bucket. So I
               had a piece of plow line laying around so I wrapped it around her leg and tied it over the cow shed
               where she couldn't get that foot in the bucket again. Then, darned if she didn’t pick up the other foot
               after 1 started milking, and put that foot in the milk bucket. So, I had another little piece of plow line and
               I tied that foot off on the other side to the side ofthe building and started milking again.”


               Then he said as soon as 1 got the milk going into the bucket again, darned if she didn't Hop around and
               get her tail into the bucket. Well, I didn’t have any more plow line, and I needed to tie her tail
               somewhere so she could not put her tail in the bucket, and the only thing I could think of to tie her tail
               up to the rafter was to take off my belt and wrap it around her tail and buckle the belt around one of the
               rafters. That’s what I done, and while I was fastening the belt around the rafters, naturally since I didn’t
               have any belt on, my britches fell down around my ankles. That is the moment my wife chose to come
               into the milk shed, and she took one look, and said, “Well dammed if we ain’t gonna have to get a
               divorce”.










































                                                                                                                   183





                          www.LakeCityHistory.com LCH-UUID: B423BA50-F22B-4D87-A44C-403308C92982
   186   187   188   189   190   191   192   193   194   195   196